BDE Meaning in Text: What BDE Means and How to Use It

Have you ever scrolled through Twitter, seen someone comment “that’s BDE” on a post, and thought—what does that even mean? You’re definitely not alone. This three-letter acronym has taken over social media, dating apps, and casual texting, leaving many people scratching their heads.

Here’s the thing: BDE isn’t what you might think at first glance. While the literal translation might make you blush, the actual meaning is something most of us recognize instantly once we understand it. It’s about that magnetic quality some people have—the unshakable confidence that makes you think, “Wow, they’ve really got it together.”

In this guide, we’ll break down everything you need to know about BDE: what it really means, where it came from, how to use it without looking clueless, and whether it’s ever appropriate in professional settings. By the end, you’ll be fluent in one of the internet’s favorite compliments.

What Does BDE Stand For? The Real Definition

Let’s address the elephant in the room: BDE stands for “Big Dick Energy.”

Yes, it sounds crude. Yes, it references anatomy. But here’s what makes BDE interesting—it has almost nothing to do with the literal words.

The Actual Meaning Behind BDE

BDE describes a type of effortless confidence and charisma that someone radiates. It’s that self-assured energy you notice when someone walks into a room and just seems comfortable in their own skin. They’re not trying too hard, not seeking validation, not compensating for anything—they’re just genuinely confident.

Think of it this way: BDE is the opposite of someone who constantly tells you how successful they are. It’s the person who achieves something impressive and shrugs it off like it’s no big deal.

What BDE is NOT about:

• Physical attributes or anatomy
• Gender (anyone can have it)
• Arrogance or cockiness
• Showing off or bragging

What BDE IS about:

• Quiet, unshakable self-assurance
• Being comfortable with who you are
• Handling challenges with grace
• Natural charisma without trying
• Confidence that doesn’t need validation

Key Characteristics of Someone With BDE

People with genuine BDE tend to share certain traits:

1. They’re secure without being arrogant – They know their worth but don’t need to announce it
2. They stay calm under pressure – While others panic, they handle stress with composure
3. They lift others up – Real confidence doesn’t require putting others down
4. They don’t overexplain themselves – No excessive justification for their choices
5. They’re comfortable with silence – No need to fill every gap in conversation
6. They can laugh at themselves – Humility and confidence coexist perfectly

Celebrity Examples of BDE

Want to understand BDE better? Here are some universally recognized examples:

Keanu Reeves – The poster child for BDE. He’s one of Hollywood’s biggest stars, yet he’s been photographed eating a sandwich alone on a curb, riding the subway, and giving up his seat for others. He handles fame with humility and never seems to need the spotlight. That’s textbook BDE.

Rihanna – Whether she’s launching a billion-dollar beauty empire or showing up fashionably late to the Met Gala, Rihanna embodies fearless authenticity. She does what she wants, when she wants, and makes no apologies. Pure BDE.

Idris Elba – His commanding presence speaks louder than any resume. He doesn’t chase validation—roles chase him. That quiet confidence is exactly what BDE represents.

Lizzo – Self-love and confidence personified. She celebrates herself unapologetically while spreading positivity. Her BDE comes from genuine self-acceptance, not performance.

Pedro Pascal – The way he’s embraced internet fame while staying grounded and authentic shows major BDE. He’s comfortable being himself, whether that’s goofy or serious.

Notice something? These people are all different—different genders, different styles, different industries. BDE isn’t about fitting a mold; it’s about authentic confidence in whatever form that takes for you.

The Origins: How BDE Became Internet Famous

Every viral term has an origin story, and BDE’s is surprisingly specific.

The Viral Moment That Started It All

In June 2018, a photo surfaced from a red carpet event showing actor Jason Momoa standing next to a group of celebrities. Despite being shorter than some of the others in the picture, Momoa’s relaxed, confident posture stood out. He wasn’t trying to look taller or more impressive—he was just comfortable being himself.

Twitter user @imbobswaget tweeted about the photo, coining the phrase “big dick energy” to describe Momoa’s undeniable confident aura. The tweet went massively viral, and suddenly everyone was talking about BDE.

Within days, the phrase exploded across social media. People started identifying BDE in others, debating who had it, and using it to compliment confident behavior they observed. By the end of June 2018, major publications like Esquire, The Cut, and Vox were writing think pieces about the phenomenon.

How BDE Evolved

While the Jason Momoa moment made BDE mainstream, the concept likely existed in internet subcultures before then. Online forums and group chats had been using similar phrases to describe that specific type of quiet confidence, but it took a viral moment to bring it to everyone’s vocabulary.

Evolution timeline:

• Pre-2018: Niche use in meme communities and private group chats
• June 2018: Jason Momoa tweet goes viral, mainstream breakthrough
• 2018-2019: Widespread adoption across social media platforms
• 2020-Present: Established part of internet slang, used both seriously and ironically

Why BDE Stuck Around

Most internet slang has a short shelf life. So why did BDE persist years after that initial tweet?

1. It filled a linguistic gap – There wasn’t really a single word for this specific type of confidence before BDE
2. It’s incredibly relatable – Everyone knows someone with BDE, even if they couldn’t name it before
3. It’s versatile – Works as both sincere compliment and ironic self-praise
4. It’s memorable – The edgy name makes it stick in your mind
5. It’s inclusive – Once people understood it’s not about gender, it became universal

The term represents a cultural shift toward valuing authentic confidence over performative displays of success. In an age of Instagram highlight reels and personal branding, BDE celebrates people who don’t need to try so hard.

BDE in Action: Real-World Examples and Usage

Understanding BDE in theory is one thing—seeing how people actually use it is another. Let’s look at how BDE appears across different platforms and contexts.

Texting and Direct Messages

In casual texting, BDE usually appears as a compliment about someone’s confident behavior:

Example 1: Praising a friend’s composure

• “Did you see Sarah shut down that rude customer? Total BDE.”
• Context: Complimenting someone who handled a difficult situation calmly

Example 2: Self-deprecating humor

• “Just parallel parked on the first try. My BDE is off the charts today 😂”
• Context: Jokingly celebrating a small victory with exaggerated confidence

Example 3: Dating app conversation

• “That pic of you skydiving? Major BDE vibes.”
• Context: Flirty compliment about someone’s adventurous confidence

Example 4: Group chat hype

• “The way you called out your boss in that meeting? THAT’S BDE”
• Context: Friends celebrating someone standing up for themselves

Social Media Usage

BDE dominates platforms like Twitter, Instagram, and TikTok in various forms:

On Twitter/X:

• Quote tweets praising public figures: “The way @sza responded to that criticism? Nothing but BDE”
• Reaction to viral moments: “That’s the most BDE thing I’ve seen all year”
• List memes: “Things that have BDE: – Wearing sunglasses indoors at dinner – Ordering dessert first – Leaving a party without saying goodbye”

On TikTok:

• Comments on confident content: “The BDE is radiating through my screen”
• Stitches analyzing celebrity moments: “Let’s talk about this BDE move…”
• Hashtag #BDE has accumulated over 250 million views, showing just how mainstream the term has become

On Instagram:

• Caption culture: “Just living that BDE life” (often used ironically)
• Comments complimenting bold posts: “The confidence! BDE all day”

Gaming Culture and BDE

Gamers adopted BDE enthusiastically to describe bold, confident plays:

• “He just walked into a 1v5 clutch situation and won without hesitation. Pure BDE.”
• “That was the most BDE speedrun I’ve ever watched—zero panic, all execution.”
• “Choosing the hardest difficulty on your first playthrough? BDE move.”

In gaming contexts, BDE celebrates players who take calculated risks with confidence, make bold strategic choices, or handle high-pressure moments with composure. It’s about skill execution combined with unshakeable calm.

Professional Settings: Tread Carefully

Here’s where things get tricky. While BDE is common in casual communication, using it at work requires serious consideration.

Rare appropriate scenarios:

• Very casual startup cultures with young teams
• Informal Slack channels with close colleagues you know well
• After-work social events where boundaries are more relaxed

Example of risky work usage: “The way our CEO negotiated that deal? Total BDE.” – Might work in a casual startup, definitely not in corporate America.

The problem: Even when meant as a compliment, the crude nature of the phrase can make colleagues uncomfortable, potentially constitute inappropriate workplace language, or even be interpreted as sexual harassment depending on context.

Better professional alternatives that convey the same meaning:

• “Executive presence”
• “Commanding confidence”
• “Natural leadership ability”
• “Strong presence in that meeting”
• “Handled that with impressive composure”

Bottom line: Unless you’re 100% certain your workplace culture embraces casual internet slang, avoid BDE at work entirely. The risk isn’t worth the reward.

Common Misconceptions About BDE

As with any viral term, BDE has accumulated some myths that need clearing up.

Myth #1: Only Men Can Have BDE

Reality: This is completely false and misses the entire point.

Despite the gendered terminology in its name, BDE is 100% gender-neutral. Women, non-binary individuals, and people of all gender identities can absolutely have BDE. In fact, many argue that women who exhibit BDE are particularly impressive because they’re displaying confidence in environments that haven’t historically celebrated female self-assurance.

Women with undeniable BDE:

• Michelle Obama – Grace under pressure, commanding presence, never needs to raise her voice
• Zendaya – Handles Hollywood politics and fame with maturity beyond her years
• Dolly Parton – Decades of authentic confidence and quick wit
• Serena Williams – Dominates her field with quiet determination

The misconception stems from the literal name, but anyone paying attention to how the term is actually used knows it transcends gender completely.

Myth #2: BDE Is Always Sexual or Vulgar

Reality: About 90% of BDE usage has nothing to do with sexuality.

Yes, the phrase sounds crude. But in practice, people use BDE to describe everything from:

• How someone handled a job interview
• A celebrity’s red carpet confidence
• A friend parallel parking perfectly
• Someone staying calm during a crisis
• The vibe of a perfectly executed presentation

When it might be inappropriate:

• Using it to comment on someone’s physical appearance
• In contexts where the recipient might interpret it sexually
• When there’s a power dynamic involved (boss to employee)
• With people who’ve expressed discomfort with the term

The key is reading the room and understanding that while the phrase has crude origins, its modern usage is primarily about attitude and energy.

Myth #3: BDE Equals Arrogance or Cockiness

Reality: True BDE is the exact opposite of arrogance.

This is perhaps the most important distinction to understand. Let’s break it down:

BDE (Confidence)	Arrogance
Quiet self-assurance	Loud boasting
Lifts others up	Puts others down
Comfortable with uncertainty	Pretends to know everything
Can laugh at themselves	Takes themselves too seriously
Doesn’t need validation	Constantly seeks approval
Secure in who they are	Overcompensating for insecurity

Example of BDE: Keanu Reeves being asked about his accomplishments and responding with humility.

Example of Arrogance: Someone who starts every sentence with “Well, actually…” and needs everyone to know how smart they are.

The paradox of BDE is that the people who truly have it often don’t realize it, while people desperately trying to project BDE usually come across as having its opposite—SDE (Small Dick Energy), which we’ll discuss more in a moment.

Myth #4: You Have to Be Physically Attractive to Have BDE

Reality: BDE is completely independent of conventional attractiveness.

Some of the most cited examples of BDE come from people who don’t fit Hollywood beauty standards. BDE is about how you carry yourself, not how you look. It’s the energy you give off, your demeanor, your confidence—none of which require being conventionally attractive.

Examples that prove this:

• Danny DeVito – Beloved for his confident, unbothered energy despite not fitting typical leading man looks
• Lizzo – Radiates confidence in an industry obsessed with certain body types
• Steve Buscemi – Unique appearance but undeniable cool factor and self-assurance

In fact, some of the most physically attractive people completely lack BDE because they’re insecure, try too hard, or need constant validation. Meanwhile, average-looking people who are genuinely comfortable with themselves radiate way more BDE.

Myth #5: BDE Is a Permanent, Fixed Trait

Reality: BDE can fluctuate based on context, life circumstances, and personal growth.

You might have incredible BDE in your professional life but feel completely out of your depth in romantic situations. Or you might be the most confident person at a party but freeze during public speaking. This is called “situational BDE.”

Factors that can affect your BDE levels:

• Life challenges: Going through tough times can temporarily shake confidence
• Context: You might have BDE at work but not at the gym
• Personal growth: You can develop more BDE over time
• Environment: Cultural settings and comfort levels matter
• Mental health: Depression and anxiety can diminish your usual confidence

The good news? BDE isn’t some magical quality you’re either born with or without. It can be cultivated through genuine self-acceptance, building real competence, and working through insecurities.

The BDE Family: Similar Terms and Alternatives

BDE isn’t the only term describing confident energy. Understanding the nuances between similar phrases helps you choose the right one for each context.

Comprehensive Comparison

Term	Meaning	Key Difference	Best Usage	Tone
BDE	Quiet, unshakable confidence	Original term, slightly edgy	Social media, casual texting	Playful, bold
Main Character Energy	Living life like you’re the protagonist	More about self-focus and agency	TikTok, Gen Z communication	Empowering, individualistic
Sigma Energy	Independent lone-wolf confidence	Emphasizes non-conformity and self-reliance	Gaming culture, philosophy discussions	Serious, philosophical
Boss Energy	Leadership-oriented confidence	Professional achievement angle	Work contexts, career discussions	Motivational, aspirational
Unbothered Energy	Calm indifference to drama	Specifically about not caring what others think	Response to negativity or criticism	Defensive, protective
That Energy	Generic confident vibe	Vague, catchall phrase	Any situation (least specific)	Neutral, flexible

When to Use Alternatives

For professional settings:

• “She has such a strong executive presence” (instead of BDE)
• “His leadership energy is impressive” (instead of BDE)
• “You commanded that room” (instead of “You had major BDE”)

For family-friendly contexts:

• “Main Character Energy” works great for younger audiences
• “Confident vibes” is safe for all ages
• “Strong presence” is universally appropriate

When you want to be less edgy:

• “Natural charisma” captures the essence without the crude terminology
• “Self-assured energy” is a direct, clean equivalent
• “Effortless confidence” describes the quality accurately

The Opposite: SDE (Small Dick Energy)

While we’re discussing BDE, we should address its opposite: SDE, or “Small Dick Energy.”

SDE describes behavior that screams insecurity and overcompensation:

Examples of SDE behavior:

• Talking constantly about your accomplishments without being asked
• Putting others down to make yourself look better
• Overly aggressive behavior to prove toughness
• Name-dropping and showing off expensive possessions
• Getting defensive when questioned
• Needing to “one-up” everyone’s stories
• Bragging about things that should speak for themselves

Why SDE is more problematic than BDE: While BDE celebrates positive traits, SDE specifically mocks insecurity. It’s inherently meaner and more judgmental. Using SDE to describe someone’s behavior often comes across as cruel rather than observational.

Important note: Just like BDE, SDE isn’t actually about anatomy—it’s about behavior patterns that reveal deep insecurity. However, because it’s used to mock rather than compliment, it’s generally better to avoid using SDE altogether unless you’re intentionally being harsh.

How to Respond When Someone Says You Have BDE

Receiving “You have BDE” as a compliment can feel weird if you’re not familiar with the term. Here’s how to handle it across different contexts.

Reading the Situation First

Before responding, quickly assess:

1. Who said it? Close friend, acquaintance, stranger, or colleague?
2. What platform? Text, public comment, dating app, or in person?
3. What’s the tone? Genuine compliment, friendly teasing, or potentially creepy?
4. What’s the context? What were you doing that prompted this comment?

Response Options by Context

Casual and Friendly Situations:

If a friend compliments your confidence:

• “Haha, I try! 💪”
• “Just out here living my best life”
• “My secret? Coffee and strategic delusion”
• “Thanks! I learned from the best” (compliment them back)

Flirty or Dating Contexts:

If someone on a dating app says this:

• “You’re not the first to notice 😏”
• “Glad it’s working”
• “Takes one to know one” (mirror their energy)
• “I’ll take that as a compliment”

Humble or Deflecting Responses:

If you’re uncomfortable with the attention:

• “I appreciate that, but I was just being myself”
• “More like ‘faking it till I make it’ energy”
• “That’s kind of you to say”
• “I don’t know about all that, but thanks!”

Professional Context (if someone says it at work):

If a colleague inappropriately uses BDE:

• “Thanks for noticing my confidence in that presentation” (reframe professionally)
• “I appreciate the feedback” (keep it brief and move on)
• Don’t echo the language back in a work setting

When NOT to Respond

Sometimes the best response is no response:

• From strangers in weird contexts – If someone you don’t know comments this on your photo in a creepy way, ignore or block
• When it feels like harassment – If someone repeatedly makes comments about your “energy” despite your discomfort
• When it seems like negging – If someone says it in a backhanded way: “Wow, you actually have BDE for once”
• In professional settings where it’s clearly inappropriate – Don’t validate the language choice by engaging

Trust your gut. If something feels off about how or why someone said it, you don’t owe them a response.

Cultural and Regional Variations

While internet culture spreads rapidly, BDE doesn’t translate equally everywhere.

Where BDE Thrives

United States: The birthplace and epicenter of BDE usage. Widespread across all social media platforms, particularly common among people under 40. Used both seriously and ironically depending on context.

United Kingdom and Australia: Popular in meme culture and casual online communication. Brits and Aussies have adapted it with their characteristic humor, often using it more ironically than Americans.

Canada: Usage patterns similar to the US, with perhaps slightly more reserved application in professional contexts.

Translation and Adaptation Challenges

BDE presents unique challenges for non-English speakers:

The problem: The crude, slang nature doesn’t translate cleanly into other languages. Direct translations often sound even more vulgar or lose the cultural meaning entirely.

How it’s adapted:

• Many international social media users simply use “BDE” untranslated, treating it as a loanword
• Some languages have developed their own equivalents focused on “charisma” or “confidence”
• In multilingual contexts, people often explain it as “confident energy” rather than translating literally

Cultural concepts with similar meaning:

• French: “avoir du chien” (having dog/style)
• Spanish: “seguridad en sí mismo” (self-security/confidence)
• Japanese: “堂々とした” (doudou to shita – dignified, confident bearing)

None quite capture the specific internet-culture flavor of BDE, which is partly why the English term persists globally.

Generational Differences

Gen Z (Ages 16-27):

• Uses BDE constantly, often ironically
• Comfortable with the crude terminology
• Applies it to everything from parallel parking to responding to texts quickly
• Most likely to use it in variations and creative contexts

Millennials (Ages 28-43):

• The generation that created and popularized BDE
• Uses it both sincerely and ironically
• Comfortable with the term but slightly more discerning about context
• More likely to explain it to older generations

Gen X (Ages 44-59):

• Less familiar with the term overall
• May find it crude or confusing at first
• Once explained, often appreciates the concept if not the terminology
• Less likely to use it themselves

Baby Boomers and older (60+):

• Generally unfamiliar unless very online
• May find the explicit terminology off-putting
• Often prefer traditional terms like “confidence” or “presence”

How to explain BDE to older generations: Focus on the confidence aspect: “It’s internet slang for when someone has really natural, unshakable confidence—like they’re completely comfortable being themselves.”

The Fine Line: When BDE Becomes Inappropriate or Offensive

Understanding where BDE crosses from compliment to problem is crucial for using it responsibly.

Context Is Everything

Generally appropriate:

• Among close friends who understand internet culture
• Casual social media comments on public figures
• Complimenting someone’s confident handling of a situation
• Self-deprecating humor about your own actions

Generally inappropriate:

• Workplace emails or formal communications
• First interactions with strangers
• Comments to people in vulnerable positions
• When someone has asked you not to use crude language

How Tone Changes Everything

The exact same phrase can be a compliment or an insult depending on delivery:

“Nice BDE there”

As a genuine compliment: Said warmly after someone handles a difficult situation well

• Interpretation: “I’m impressed by your confidence”

As sarcasm: Said mockingly after someone fails or shows off

• Interpretation: “You thought you were impressive but you weren’t”

As flirtation: Said with specific tone and context on a date

• Interpretation: Ranges from charming to creepy depending on relationship

Key factors that change meaning:

• Emoji usage (😏 vs 😂 vs no emoji)
• Relationship context (best friend vs. stranger)
• What prompted the comment (genuine confidence vs. showing off)
• Platform (private text vs. public comment)

Gender Dynamics and Power Considerations

BDE gets complicated when gender and power dynamics enter the equation:

Men using BDE to describe women:

• Can be fine between equals who know each other well
• Can feel objectifying from strangers or in professional contexts
• Particularly problematic if there’s a power imbalance (boss to employee)
• Extra caution needed to ensure it doesn’t cross into sexual commentary

Women using BDE:

• Generally more accepted as reclaimed slang
• Seen as empowering when women use it to describe themselves or other women
• Less likely to be misinterpreted as harassment

Non-binary and LGBTQ+ usage:

• The term’s gender-neutral application makes it particularly popular in queer communities
• Used to celebrate confidence regardless of gender expression

Power dynamics to watch:

• Boss to subordinate: Never appropriate
• Teacher to student: Absolutely not
• Older person to much younger person: Risky
• Anyone to someone they supervise: Don’t do it

When BDE Crosses Into Harassment

BDE becomes problematic or harassment when:

1. It focuses on physical attributes rather than behavior or energy
2. It’s unwanted and repeated despite someone’s discomfort
3. It’s used in contexts with sexual undertones without mutual understanding
4. It makes someone feel objectified rather than genuinely complimented
5. There’s a power imbalance that makes saying no difficult

Red flag examples:

• “That outfit gives you major BDE” (focuses on appearance rather than confidence)
• Repeatedly commenting on someone’s “energy” after they’ve shown discomfort
• Using it in explicitly sexual contexts without clear consent
• A manager telling an employee they have “BDE” (power dynamic issue)

Safe Usage Guidelines

To use BDE responsibly:

1. Know your audience – Is this person comfortable with internet slang and mild crudeness?
2. Focus on actions, not attributes – Comment on what someone did, not how they look
3. Read the room – Is this an appropriate context for casual slang?
4. Don’t use it in first interactions – Build rapport first
5. Respect discomfort – If someone seems uncomfortable, apologize and move on
6. When in doubt, choose different words – “Confidence,” “composure,” “presence” work great

Frequently Asked Questions About BDE

Can women have BDE?

Absolutely, yes! This is one of the biggest misconceptions about BDE. Despite the gendered language in the name, BDE is completely gender-neutral. Women like Rihanna, Lizzo, Michelle Obama, Zendaya, and countless others are frequently cited as having incredible BDE.

In fact, many argue that women who exhibit BDE are particularly impressive because they’re showing confidence in environments and industries that haven’t always celebrated female self-assurance. The term describes confidence and charisma—qualities that exist independent of gender identity.

Is BDE always a compliment?

About 90% of the time, yes—but context and tone matter significantly. In most cases, calling someone’s behavior or attitude “BDE” is meant as genuine praise for their confidence and composure.

However, it can be used sarcastically (“Oh wow, real BDE move there” after someone fails) or as subtle mockery. The relationship between the people involved and the delivery matters enormously. When in doubt, look at the speaker’s tone, relationship to the person, and the situation that prompted the comment.

What’s the opposite of BDE?

The commonly used opposite is “SDE” (Small Dick Energy), which describes insecure, overcompensating, or try-hard behavior. Examples include talking excessively about accomplishments, putting others down to feel superior, displaying overly aggressive behavior to prove toughness, or showing off expensive possessions unnecessarily.

However, SDE is more problematic than BDE because it specifically mocks insecurity rather than celebrating positive traits. While BDE lifts people up, SDE tears them down, making it a meaner concept overall.

Where did BDE originally come from?

BDE went mainstream in June 2018 after a viral tweet about actor Jason Momoa. A photo showed him at a red carpet event standing next to taller celebrities, but his relaxed, confident posture stood out. Twitter user @imbobswaget tweeted about his “big dick energy,” and the phrase exploded across social media within hours.

However, the concept likely existed in niche internet forums and private group chats before this moment. The Momoa tweet simply gave it mainstream visibility and a memorable name that stuck.

How do I know if I have BDE?

Here’s the paradox: people with true BDE usually don’t worry about whether they have it. That self-assurance without needing external validation is exactly what BDE represents.

Signs you might have BDE:

• You’re comfortable in your own skin
• You don’t feel compelled to prove yourself constantly
• You handle criticism or setbacks with grace
• You lift others up rather than compete with them
• You’re secure enough to be humble and laugh at yourself

If you’re obsessing over projecting BDE or constantly trying to prove you have it, you’re probably displaying SDE instead. Authentic confidence can’t be faked—it comes from genuine self-acceptance.

Can I say BDE at work?

Generally, no—especially not in formal communications like emails, presentations, or official meetings. The crude nature of the phrase makes it inappropriate for most professional settings and could be interpreted as sexual harassment depending on context.

Rare exceptions: Very casual startup cultures, informal Slack channels with close colleagues, or after-work social events might be acceptable contexts, but even then, exercise extreme caution.

Professional alternatives: Use terms like “executive presence,” “strong confidence,” “commanding demeanor,” “leadership presence,” or “self-assured approach” instead. These convey the same meaning without risking your professional reputation.

Is using BDE body-shaming?

This is debated. The term itself references anatomy, which makes some people uncomfortable. However, most regular users argue that:

• It’s completely divorced from its literal meaning in actual usage
• It describes energy and behavior, not physical traits
• Both BDE and SDE describe how people act, not how they look

That said, if someone expresses discomfort with the term, it’s respectful to use alternatives like “confidence” or “strong presence” around them. The goal is to compliment people, not make them uncomfortable.

What are some famous examples of BDE moments?

Celebrity BDE moments:

• Keanu Reeves giving up his subway seat, then casually eating a sandwich on a curb
• Rihanna arriving fashionably late to events and owning it completely
• Steve Irwin’s calm handling of dangerous animals with zero fear
• Dolly Parton’s gracious responses to criticism with humor intact
• Beyoncé’s Formation performance at the Super Bowl
• Pedro Pascal fully embracing internet memes about himself

Everyday BDE moments:

• Admitting you don’t know something instead of pretending
• Staying calm when technology fails during your presentation
• Being the only person not on their phone in a waiting room
• Leaving a party without announcing your departure to everyone

Can you lose your BDE?

Yes! BDE isn’t a permanent, fixed trait—it can fluctuate based on life circumstances, context, and personal growth.

Factors that can affect BDE levels:

• Going through difficult times (breakups, job loss, health issues)
• Specific situations (might have BDE at work but not in dating)
• Mental health challenges (anxiety and depression impact confidence)
• Cultural settings (feeling out of place in unfamiliar environments)
• Personal development (can develop more BDE over time through growth)

It’s completely normal to have “situational BDE”—confidence in some areas of life but not others. You might be the most self-assured person in professional settings but feel awkward in social situations, or vice versa.

Is there a female-specific version of BDE?

Some people have attempted to create alternatives like “BGE” (Big Goddess Energy) or “BVE” (Big Vagina Energy), but none have achieved the same cultural penetration as BDE.

Most people prefer keeping BDE gender-neutral rather than creating separate gendered versions, as doing so reinforces the outdated idea that confidence is somehow different for different genders. The whole point of BDE is that anyone can have it regardless of gender identity—creating female-specific versions would undermine that inclusive message.

Conclusion: The Real Power of BDE

At its core, BDE represents something we all recognize but struggled to name: that magnetic quality of people who are genuinely comfortable in their own skin. It’s not about being the loudest person in the room, the most successful, or the most conventionally attractive. It’s about authentic confidence without arrogance—and that’s something truly special.

Key Takeaways

What to remember about BDE:

• It’s about unshakable confidence and charisma, not anatomy or gender
• Use it casually with friends who understand internet slang
• Avoid it in professional settings—use alternatives like “executive presence”
• Context and tone determine whether it’s appropriate or offensive
• Anyone can develop authentic confidence over time through self-acceptance

The cultural significance: BDE resonated because it named something we all experience. In a social media era of curated highlight reels and performative confidence, BDE celebrates people who don’t need to try so hard. It’s a reminder that real confidence comes from within, not from external validation.

Whether you choose to use the term or not, understanding what BDE represents can help you recognize authentic confidence in others and perhaps cultivate it in yourself. And that might be the most valuable takeaway of all.

Now we want to hear from you: What’s the most BDE moment you’ve witnessed? Drop a comment below with your favorite example—whether it’s a celebrity, a friend, or even yourself in a moment of surprising confidence. Let’s celebrate authentic self-assurance together.